Things you hate about yourself (but probably you shouldn't)

We all have things about ourselves that we dislike right? What better way to begin the process of confronting these things than knowing what they are? The things that I list aren’t necessarily true for me personally, but I’m pretty sure some of you can relate.

So here we go…

You know I’ve actually never seen this movie… (My Photoshop skills though… [Stuntin’ hard emoji here])

1. You’re Lazy

I heard somewhere that “You hate yourself because you don’t do anything.” And this one hit me pretty hard when I first heard it (not hard enough though because I’ve just ran out of shows to watch on Netflix.) I’m sure a good amount of us hate how lazy we are, but are actually too lazy to do anything about it. Just remember that everything inside you will fight improvement and use that as motivation to not be lazy and not hate yourself. And unsubscribe to Netflix.

2. Your Breath Smells

I can only assume this because everyone and their mother asks me if I have gum every 10 seconds. I WOULD have gum if someone didn’t have an addiction to 5-gum like it was crack.

3. You Have a Hobby That You Haven’t Done in a While

I haven’t really practiced dance (my favorite past-time) all summer . Why? Partly because of time and partly because I’m lazy. Lately, there have been times where I literally have to force myself to play my PS3. I haven’t worked on my spoken word poetry for about six months. The point I’m trying to make is that these are all things that I enjoy doing (or at least thought so) and I haven’t had the effort to do. Do I hate myself because of this? Well I hate that I haven’t contributed time into doing these things like I used to. This also means that things that used to be my passion are starting to become tedious which isn’t exactly a good thing.

So if you have a hobby, make sure to keep it a passion and if you enjoy it, do it. If you don’t, find a new passion.

4. Nobody Ever Likes Your Statuses On Facebook

Stop talking about how single you are and stop talking about your cats. (And if you feel like I’m referring directly to you, that’s because I am.)

5. Your Physical Appearance

Hey… We’re all beautiful

6. Your Voice

It’s not just me right? I was horrified the first time I heard my voice. I sound like the most non-intimidating black guy ever created (including the ones in England). But what makes me feel better about my voice is knowing that everyone else hates the sound of their own voice (except for Sarah Palin and Bill O’Reilly.) So maybe keeping that in mind will help you believe in your own voice.

“If you believe that your speech is normal, it’s because your impediment is listening.” – Some guy with a lisp

7. You Have No Friends

 

Really you do have friends, you just don’t have many. (Or you don’t like your friends.)

8. You Didn’t Get Beyonce’s New Album

For real though. Like I’m not usually into the whole female RnB/Pop genre… But get that CD.

9. You’re Misunderstood

Would it help if I told you that I think that most people are? At least you are not as misunderstood as this guy…

Learn how to express yourself better. This is one of the reasons I blog and perform spoken word. I can control exactly how I express myself this way. Through different forms of expression, there are different ways to portray ourselves or our ideas.

For example, that last sentence just made you think I was smart, when really I could just be good at wording. Through this blog I can make myself come off as sincere, funny, smart, or insane as I want. It’s up to me and how I understand the medium in which I am using.

Now I’m not saying fool people into thinking you’re sincere,but what I am saying is that there are multiple ways to make sure that people understand you and you should explore them and find a way that suits you.

10. You’re Awkward

 

Maybe this is universal, maybe this is just me. But personally, I can’t control it. My awkwardness comes out in different ways and without warning. But if you’re like me and you’re awkward, then own it homeskillet (awkward lingo). Turn awkward into a style. Make it cool because in reality, awkward is the new cool because everyone can relate to awkward.
So there it is. Ten things you hate about you. Maybe you can relate to some, maybe you can relate to none. And if the latter is the case…

Congrats. You’re superhuman.